In the past five years of my travels I have been dating on and off, depending on my mood, my need for company and, to be honest, my sex drive. It has been funny, sweet, hilarious and frustrating. Because of the locations I am at I am seen more as an opportunity than as a woman. So I have to be careful who to trust my fragile romantic heart to.
The men I get in touch with or who get in touch with me are sometimes very obvious. And those in a rush, have a second agenda most of the time. I share two stories that happened in my WhatsApp and messenger in two continents.
Men can be hilarious sometimes and you are allowed to laugh. I did, so feel free!
In Mexico a few weeks ago…….during lunch in the Falafel shop on 10th avenue in Playa del Carmen, I had this conversation with a young man from Cancun…….
🙎🏻♂️ Hi, where do you live?
🙍♀️ Playa del Carmen
🙎🏻♂️ Where are you from?
🙎🏻♂️ So you want a boyfriend or a husband
🙎🏻♂️ I can come to Playa and live in your resort this week
It is not bound to a continent or culture, it happens worldwide
Now you would think that is because Mexican men see opportunities for sex everywhere and love women, or because I live in a tourist area. But trust me it happens all over the world, tourism nearby or not.
To proof that I share a story of a man desperately wanting to marry me in the Philippines. He admired me for driving a Kawasaki Bajaj Dominar 400 and he saw a chance when he heard I was single again since I ended my relationship with my Filipino lover.
Here is how that conversation on Messenger went. It was on a small island in the Philippines, hardly any tourists, let alone “white women” (their way of addressing foreigners).
🤡 Ok, let’s go on a date ma’am
🙍♀️ No thank you,
🤡 But I like you
🙍♀️ We haven’t even met, so how can you say that?
🤡 I feel it in my heart
🙍♀️ O really……still, no thank you
🤡 But I like to ride your Dominar ma’am……
Sorry for the clown face but I really consider this kind of men ass-clowns.
It is not hard to separate the opportunists from the real interested
Now, these guys were pretty obvious and easy to pin down as not serious candidates. But what if your date is harder to figure out? Sometimes your mind gets clouded by all the work and time they put in, it even happened to me that I was catfished. My alleged monogamous boyfriend was a person that did not even exist, he told so many lies that afterwards I even doubted his name and everything he told me. It was only weeks after the break-up I found out even more about him that made me so happy I dumped him.
Not every frog you kiss is a prince
Dating around the world, as an older white female has its challenges and you really have to be careful. I heard stories of men wanting to move in within a week, desperate for a house. Or coming back after a good night of sex only to rob the place. But also those who use women for a one night stand pretending they are interested in more.
Sometimes both men and women that are in online relationships or in real relationships get scammed, I wrote a few articles about that as well.
For us romantic women:
Always make sure you follow your own time path and gut feeling when dating, whether it is at home or while travelling. And when you are travelling consider this: you date in a different culture, under a full moon probably, in a more romantic setting than when you are at home. So keep those butterflies under control and stay in touch with your gut feeling. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is, if it sounds like a joke, it probably is also…….be your powerful self.
I have another one for you! This one is an actual date in the Netherlands, just to prove that weird dates and propositions happen all over the world (and that I have an odd choice when it comes to men, hahaha)
It was a date set in another city, we planned going for a walk in the forest on a Sunday afternoon with tea afterwards, in a tea house in the forest. I was to meet him at his house, he owned a car, we would leave from there.
👨🏻🦰 Hi, welcome, nice you are here, this is for you (handing me an A4 paper)
🙍♀️ Hi, nice to see you again, what is this?
👨🏻🦰 I worked out a timetable for today, it is our schedule
🙍♀️ Timetable….wtf…..14.00 – 15.00 drinking tea……15.00-16.00 forest walk……16.00-16.15 riding home……16.15-16.30 kissing and making out while heating the hot tub……..
🤦♀️ You are kidding, right?
👨🏻🦰 You do not like a hot tub?
🙍♀️ Am I in some Candid Camera show or something?
👨🏻🦰 Most women love the hot tub……
🙍♀️ Timetable, most women….hot tub…..what are you thinking?
👨🏻🦰 Don’t be a prude, come inside, I make you some tea !?
So girls, what do you think? Good moves? Would you be flattered? Do you like a dip in a hot tub naked on a first date?
Jeanette, a Dutch female nomad, started to travel the world at the age of 17. Walker of beaches, shell searcher and iPhone photographer. Writer and owner of two websites
Currently, she lives in Mexico.
She is an emigration coach and works online.