I think we all have been there one time or another: that moment in life you wanted to escape it all. Ride into the sunset and never look back. Because of embarrassment, loss, sadness, financial problems, and I’m sure you can name a few yourself.
From experience, I know that running away will not solve much. Wherever you go you take yourself with you. And even when you move overseas and leaving behind all, the memories and the thought of f.e. debt collectors will still keep you from enjoying your new life.
Maybe you are not so deep in wanting to disappear, Maybe you keep counting the weeks to your next vacation. But no matter how hard you want to, time does not move faster and problems or emotions won’t change overnight.
When work or school or just daily life is not giving you any pleasure, it is for sure you need to change. Time just flies by and you realize that life is short, that you are bored or unhappy or both and you have joined the legions of people that walk the social and economical treadmill every day without looking any deeper inside their souls because they fear what they might find there.
If that is you, you need to make some changes. For recharging during your annual break, a long weekend away or Christmas holidays will never recover you to your old self. Every year a little of you is left behind and will not surface after you unwind from stress, sorrow or heartache.
I think we all deep down in our hearts want a life that makes us happy. A life without any significant crisis or financial worries.
We all kind of reason our unhappiness away by stating that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. Glancing over that fence every now and then and trying not to envy that lucky person.
And if you are doing what you love but still do not get satisfaction, you have plenty of arguments why your world isn’t all peaches and roses.
Yet sometimes a little daredevil mindset might just do the trick to break you away from that constant heavy feeling that is bothering you every moment your mind is not occupied.
I will give you 5 ideas on how to create a happier life, maybe one of these will inspire you to follow your dreams:
1. Move to another country
If that feeling of running away is nagging you all day every day, maybe follow up on it. Start preparing for a move to another country. Go wander beyond that far horizon. But do make sure you prepare well, so you can go free and without major stress. When things ‘back home’ are not wrapped up nicely, they may haunt you on your journey pursuing a new life.
2. Minimalize your life
The stress of constantly having to perform can make you very unhappy. if you feel the constant pressure of needing a better car, a bigger house, making more money or making a career move for the better, you can easily forget the happiness and become troublesome.
If you are searching for the perfect friendship or date with a wishlist, you might not find what you are looking for, maybe just have a rough sketch and let the rest be a surprise.
And when you struggle with sadness or loss of a person, maybe it is time to remember that person for happy moments spent together instead of wanting more time with that person. Most grief comes from the feeling of being lost and alone, because of the void we feel when people leave us. When we do not focus on the void, but the gratitude of having them in our lives at least for that time they were with us, we can have happy memories and build our own future from there.
3. Stop trying so hard
Half of happiness is acceptance. Not in a negative way, but in a way that life still can surprise you with beauty and special moments. When we are constantly trying to prove ourselves, excelling in all we do, to our boss, friends, and family. We are constantly overachieving, This puts an enormous amount of stress on our shoulders.
When we accept that we are who we are, life becomes easier and when we also accept that a job well-done is that: a job well done, we learn to get satisfaction out of simple things, little things, and we can relax.
Too many people live above their standard, their intelligence, and their abilities. Just step down and see what happens. It is not what they think about you, it is how you feel about yourself.
4.Figure out what is bothering you
Every time you cry out that you need a vacation, a break or maybe even a drink, just stop and analyze what brought on that feeling. Is it your job? Do you not like the workload, the work itself or your boss? Is it your friends or family members that make you want to run away? The endless amount of bills piling up?
Then, can you change your way of handling it? So that the need to run away from it all is not so overwhelming? Maybe you need a change of job? help with finances or a mediator to fix relationship issues.
5. Small changes can make a big difference
It is obvious that big changes can make a huge difference. But we cannot all afford to move to another country or finding a new job can be pretty hard. But you can start small to make big changes that will turn your life for the better. Start with yourself.
Can you shift your attitude just a little to the middle so life is not so hard on you?
Can you change the way you think about your life, your job, your family or even about yourself? That might just do the trick and get that creative flow working again so you can come up with ideas to make even bigger improvements.
When you are not preoccupied with what is going wrong or what is hurting you or keeping you down, you get space in your head to look at opportunities and find new ways to deal with the things bothering you.
Look at your life as a story that you tell someone, would that person want to hear the story?
If nobody would read the book of your life, it is probably better to rewrite your story, and you are never too old to do so.
Today might be a good day to start anew. The effort to make a change gives you energy. And happiness comes from that. Embody your own escape plan. Get to know yourself and what is important to you, are you happy on locations? Or happy amongst people? Could you be happy freelancing? Or do you have a hobby or a skill that you can turn into a profitable business or service that can get you out of your job?
Are you still living in a place where the memories of that person that makes you cry are vivid? Maybe just change the wallpaper (I mean that literally, make the place yours!)
I tell you this: only working on an escape plan will give you so much energy that all the other things that bother you will fall away. They will look less overwhelming. The moment you make that appointment with a financial planner to get out of debt will give you a certain freedom, a date to look forward to. That moment you start your sessions with a coach or mediator will help you focus on what is important for you and how to communicate that.
For some people, it is hard to find a way out. Because the art of self-reflecting can be stressful on its own. I created an enclosed membership area where I help people that need a little guidance or help in changing their lives for the better.
Some need practical advice about moving abroad, others need more structure in their thoughts to create an escape plan. Others just want someone to talk to.
Jeanette, a Dutch female nomad, started to travel the world at the age of 17. Walker of beaches, shell searcher and iPhone photographer. Writer and owner of two websites
Currently, she lives in Mexico.
She is an emigration coach and works online.